Tethered and Frazzled--Sticks, Stones, and Words (Blog7)

 




Case Study 101:  Ashanti, a 12-year-old African American girl is sitting in her 6th grade classroom.  She is tall and skinny like a string bean with a plaits on both sides of her head (a spit hair plan).  Oh yeah! She also sports a bang. Her grandma nicely comb pressed her hair for school.  She is a real girlie girl with her colored barrettes, painted nails, and fruity smelling lip gloss.  She does not wear the most expensive clothes, but her grandma sure grooms her well for school.  Here comes Mary, a big strapping bowlegged girl. There is rumor she already had a baby.  She shows up in class from a northern city—New York or someplace like that, from up the road, as Ashanti’s relatives would say.  She really looks older than Ashanti and the other girls in the class. She talks with a deep voice and she is not the best academic student.  She cheats off other people’s papers.  She probably got in trouble at her last school. 

Every day, she orders Ashanti to sharpen her pencil.  Ashanti wonders in her mind, “Why can’t she get up to sharpen her own pencil?”  It’s easier when you make someone else your flunky.  Ashanti hated it!  Reluctantly, Ashanti sharpens Mary’s pencil every time she commands.  She continued to wonder, “Why could not the teacher see this is happening?”  The teacher had to see that Ashanti is writing with a perfectly leaded pencil and did not need to go to the pencil sharpener. Right?  

Mary got into several fights with other girls within her first two weeks of arrival at Cades-Hebron Elementary School in the rural countryside of Cades, South Carolina.  There’s no way Ashanti is taking a chance at getting slugged like Justine and Roberta.  Mary texts Ashanti about how she is going to fight more girls when she gets to school. Mary later sends Ashanti a message on Twitter.  She tells Ashanti that when gets to school tomorrow, she must deliver a threatening message to a Carlotta.  The message was, “Watch yo back crooked b***ch.”  

Ashanti thought that no way she was delivering this message.  Once and for all—she picks up the phone to dial Mary that she refuses to serve on her papergirl route.  She dials the number 843-777-9311.  Mary said, “Hello Ashanti, you got my message?”  Ashanti answers, “Yes Mary.  I am not delivering a message for you to Carlotta.  Furthermore, sharpen your own pencils in class.  Grandma Thomas said, “Ashanti, wake up, it’s time for dinner." 



This case is a real-life story about how I experienced face-to-face bullying in the 1980s.  There are some embellishments in this story with the cell phone and the social media, but the truth is I was a vulnerable prey to big bad Mary.  I wish it was a dream, but I know firsthand that bullying is real.  I never stopped Mary from bullying me and it is still vivid in my mind 40 years later.  Of course, we did not have Twitter back in the 80s, but the bullying starts here—face-to-face.  The research documents that females appear to likely engage in cyberbullying in K-12, both perpetrators and targets. However, males are more likely to engage in face-to-face bullying (Faucher, Cassidy, & Jackson, 2015). Traditional bullying is more widespread for students in K-12.  



It’s surprising to learn that there are no racial or ethnic differences among perpetrators or victims (Faucher, Cassidy, & Jackson, 2015).  This was alarming because in K-12 everything hinges on racial and ethnic factors. However, this fact provides consolation in knowing that strategies for prevention of cyberbullying will be universal approaches for all children regardless of specific factors that they have no control over. 


Faucher, Cassidy, and Jackson (2015) argued that many times bullying is not reported because of fear of repercussions.  It is also disheartening to learn that a significant lack of reporting maybe the source of negative impact on children such as depression, poor self-esteem, poor concentration, anxiety, academic problems, stress, and suicidal thoughts. We need children to be self-confident and not give others power to have dominion of them.  



It might have been the schools where I served, but as I reminisce about my days as an assistant principal I was tethered and frazzled from dealing with bullying matters.  We had a form that students were encouraged to complete and submit to the guidance counselors if they were bullied or know of someone else who had been bullied.  Ninety-five percent of the reports ended up with me investigating and pulling children all…day…long.  These incidences involving bullying were very cumbersome.  They were situations where an adult did not see anything.  Therefore, I basically had one student’s story against another student’s story.  I had to keep investigating until I could poke holes in someone’s story and find the perpetrator.  Sometimes it took more than one school day to find the answers.  

In this case, I had to beat the clock.  I had to make sure I reached out to a parent and explain what was going on because (a) I did not want angry parents back at the school in the afternoon, (b) I did not want angry parents at the school the next morning, and  (c) I did not want angry parents to say that the school is not doing anything.  One of the big issues is parents say that they have notified the school that their child is being bullied, but the school did not do anything about it.  I am always interested to know what they want us to do?  Faucher, Cassidy, and Jackson (2015) indicated that people want the perpetrators disciplined.  I agree that the perps need discipline, but we must first catch the perps in the act through observing (which we probably will hardly see) or through carefully corroborated stories from their peers. 


Faucher, Cassidy, and Jackson (2015) argued that education and awareness are the key factors for combatting bullying, thus cyberbullying.  It must be a whole school effort in a language that young people fully understand.  We must present the information in a way to get everyone’s attention.  Do you remember pep rallies?  We all geared up for pep rallies in the gym.  We sat with our class (freshmen, sophomores, juniors, and seniors). The Clarksville Jr. High School held a pep rally in a unique way that defies all the exciting pep rallies we had in our Kingstree Senior High gymnasium that included the cheerleaders, the band, the football team, students, and teachers.    

Strategies to Prevent Bullying and Cyberbullying

We educators must begin to combat cyberbullying by incorporating digital citizenship in the curriculum (Orech, 2012).  The approaches must be connected to the instructional program and not presented in isolation.  The exposure must be relevant for students and allow them to engage in social media experiences in which they are involved in real experiences that require thought-provoking and decision-making skills.  The following are strategies for addressing cyberbullying that also extends to the instructional staff for implementation.

The Digital Citizenship Project







References


Faucher, C., Cassidy, W., & Jackson, M. (2015). From the sandbox to the inbox: Comparing the acts, impacts, and solutions of bullying in k-12, higher education, and the workplace. Journal of Education and Training Studies, 3(6), 111-125. 

Orech, J. (2012). How it's done: Incorporating digital citizenship into your everyday curriculum. Tech & Learning, 33(1), 16-18.


Comments

  1. Some great resources here! Thank for sharing your personal experiences. Isn't it terrible that most of us have bullying stories to share?? - Sherry

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  2. I think I speak for everyone when I say thank you for sharing your story and your heart. You included so many helpful resources and experiences. I do agree that it is hard to handle bullying when you didn't see it. I think that is the reason it is so often not addressed by leadership within schools, unfortunately.

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  3. Hi Pamela,

    Thank you for sharing your personal experience with bullying. I am sorry that you had to deal with those traumatic experience, at such a young age. With the use of technology, bullying and harassments has expanded into the virtual realm with cyberbullying. Our school recently celebrated "National Bully Prevention" week and we all wore orange. It will take more than wearing colors to prevent bullying. Schools must also create a culture in which bullying is not accepted or tolerated and administration should provide tools of support to assist when someone is being bullied and to encourage others to stand up when they see someone being bullied. Loved the throw-backs video and the Steve Harvey Show! Very well written, as always!

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  4. Hi Princess,
    I appreciate how you personalized your blog with your own story of being bullied. I experienced bullying myself but luckily it did not last too long as I sought out help from an adult early on and had support from my friends. Regardless of the duration or style of bullying it can be remembered for a lifetime. I have used my experience to have empathy for others and a desire to help children who endure it. However, had it continued for an extended period or been more severe it could have had a much harder and more severe impact on me.
    I appreciate your statistical information as well. In our readings and research, I also found it interesting how cyberbullying is present with both boys and girls and effects all races and ethnicities. I too agree that education and awareness are key to help identify, prevent, and catch cyberbullying. We need to motivate students to unite against all bullying. I have saved all your suggested resources for helping to teach digital citizenship within the classroom. I specifically enjoyed your teaching channel link as it provides thought provoking activities to implement with students.
    Kelly

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